Back to Life

Wow, I can't believe I have let almost this entire year pass without posting an update! So much has happened! First and foremost, an on-line dating update: I went on dates with five or six different men from e-harmony after my last post, and none of them were what I was looking for. The dates were okay - it was nice to get out and enjoy a nice meal and conversation with someone new - but not worth pursuing anything more than a date or two in the end. I never really put much faith into on-line dating, and I'm not sure I would ever do it again. Too much hassle, too many frogs, too much money...

Luckily, I met a great guy through a friend of mine, and we've been dating since July! Within a week or two of meeting him, I closed my e-harmony account - not because I was immediately convinced he was "the one" or anything, but because I realized the two of us were way more compatible than anyone I had met on-line. I decided early on that if things didn't work out with him, I would rather rely on set-ups through friends or family than the computerized version of the search for love.

Mr. Great Guy is also divorced, has two kids, and has an ex-wife who cheated on him. It has been so much fun getting to know him and so comforting to be able to talk to someone who understands me, because he has gone through the same kind of pain. Was his ex-wife the female version of Tiger Woods? No. But she married the man she cheated with, and they now have a baby together. As fate would have it, she and I both attended the same concert a few weeks ago. I haven't met her yet, but if I would have run into her that night, I would have thanked her for letting go of Mr. Great Guy, because her loss has been my gain.

So how is Tiger (oh, excuse me, I mean Bill), you ask? Still dating multiple women, probably at the same time, as far as I can tell from his facebook updates. My anger has turned into pity for him, because I know he will never find a true, honest, loving relationship, and that all the sex in the world will not fill up his soul.

As for me, I have moved on, and I am not looking back.

My Go-To Answer to the Big Question

I struggle every time someone new discovers I'm divorced and asks me, "What happened?" A part of me wants to just say, "It's really none of your business," but at the same time, I want people to understand that the failure of my marriage was NOT my fault. That's right, I continue to refuse to take any blame for its demise, and I don't want people secretly imagining up their own twisted stories or judging me. Therefore, I have created a go-to line which pretty much sums up what happened and leaves people shocked enough that they don't ask me any more embarrassing questions: "Why did I get divorced? Oh... well, my ex-husband was aspiring to be like Tiger Woods. And I'm not talking about his golf game." Need I say more, really?

E-Harmony Guy #2

I had my third date tonight with E-harmony Guy #2. We went to a nice little restaurant and ate at the bar. It was an evening filled with good conversation and good wine, and it ended with a sweet little peck on the lips. I'm looking forward to seeing what might come of this... not getting my hopes up for anything long-term (and not even sure I want that right now), but like I said in my last post, he has potential. It's nice to know my daggers won't come out every time I interact with a man, since my faith in them as a whole has been obliterated. Happy Friday night!

35 days into the New Year...

You'll be happy to hear I am no longer sitting on the couch in my pajamas. In fact, almost immediately after writing my last post, I joined e-harmony! No more feeling sorry for myself. Time to move on. Never in my lifetime did I think I would ever join an online dating website, but really, where am I supposed to meet a fine young gentleman as a single mom of two young children? At the grocery store? Sure, I can picture it now... our eyes meet, my heart flutters, and then my son pees his pants and my daughter throws a cookie. Yes, I make a great first impression! Ha ha!

Anyway, my e-harmony subscription has led to four dates so far (with two different men). Both are six years older than me, since the men my age apparently go for women under 30 (I'm 32). I gave the first guy a second date out of pity, and the idea that sometimes it takes time to build chemistry. Needless to say, that did not happen. The second guy has possible potential, so we'll see what happens...

What else have I done with my New Year? Well, I gave up pop and chocolate, which is an impressive feat since I've been addicted to chocolate pretty much since I was born. Also, like everyone else, I'm on a mission to lose 10 pounds, so this week I started the "Cinch" diet, which meant all I could eat for five days was a combination of raspberries, yogurt, eggs, almonds, and spinach. Yum (note sarcasm).

As far as my ex... not missing him at all.

Here's to 2011! Cheers!